July is Journaling Month 5: Procrastinating.

10 Jul

Am I the only one who procrastinates over stupid things? Come on, please tell me I’m not alone. And then, if you’re like me, the Furies fly around your head and whisper stinging remarks about how you are not as smart as you think, Missy, if you can’t even go to the Post Office and buy new stamps because the one stamp you have left, of a jolly Christmas ornament, is not going to cut it for your condolence card you are sending to your friend’s mother after the shiva for her father. I find myself in utter spasms of shame for the tasks I don’t accomplish and brood about them ceaselessly. And if I try to do them,somehow my computer crashes, I lose one of the important pages, Zeus throws thunderbolts so I can’t go outside and put it in my mailbox, etc.

Today I had two tasks I needed to accomplish. One was give a speech at 10:30, and that I did manage to do, because 10:30 is Showtime, no BS about it. The other task was writing about 30 captions for my latest book, about beekeeping. It is not the kind of task that takes any kind of genius to accomplish. Basically, the pictures are of bees, beekeepers, bees’ nests, dead bees, a website about bees, smoking out bees, harvesting honey, drizzling honey on bread, and other bee-tastic things. A not-stupid person would have had this finished in 30 minutes tops. They could write, “A worker bee pollinates flowers.” And “A beekeeper holds a thing full of bees.” And “Oh wow, more beekeepers!” and “Those damn bees all need to read that Jon Kabat-Zinn about letting yourself But somehow I am in an agony of perfectionism (more than that), which means I have zero captions finished. I have however:

  1. opened up an account with Pinterest and put in all kinds of pictures about what our new and improved kitchen renovation should look like.
  2. Searched through Groupon for interesting possibilities for entertainment and jobs for Child 1.
  3. Done a large load of laundry and cleaned out and reorganized five drawers. Filled an entire garbage bag with giveaway clothes.
  4. Tried to beat my previously pathetic highest score at Mahjong Dimensions without success.
  5. Watched most of the movie Ray while unsuccessfully attempting to match socks.
  6. Had long, funny talk with Child 1 and husband at dinner about a bird that lives in Ethiopia, dropping bones on rocks so they can extract the “tasty vascular substance, marrow” (wondering, is that right? Marrow is a vascular substance? Guess so. It’s called a langer gruber or something.
  7. Typed in 2000 words from old journal (more to come on this.)
  8. Talked to sister on phone for long, gossipy chat.
  9. Lingered on Facebook way too long admiring my friends’ lives.
  10. Realized it’s 11:30.

This also brings to mind that I did not do my much promised web prompt. So, here goes:

 Prompt #5: What’s a recent thing about which you have procrastinated? Why did you procrastinate? And what did you do instead?  How do you STOP procrastinating?

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